As we support others, how can we support ourselves?

“There are days I drop words of comfort on myself like falling leaves and remember that it is enough to be taken care of by my self.” -Brian Andreas

Whether we work as coaches or counsellors, carers or health churchwindowprofessionals, we are in the profession of giving. We give time, empathy, experience, support, understanding and presence to others, unconditionally. We give of ourselves. Our innate ability to give contributes to the development of rapport with clients. This in turn creates the space and opportunity for clients to experience relief and release, peace and joy, to achieve desires once thought unattainable and to experience healing.

In return for our giving, we receive. We experience fulfilment and gratitude in the work we do within client relationships. We allow ourselves acknowledge our purpose in the world. We experience our potential and our gifts.

However, whenever we over-extend ourselves in our giving to others, it is inevitable that we sometimes lose touch with our own needs. Needs we might have been unaware of. Needs that change all the time. We can find it a challenge to get out of our own way to check in with ourselves as to how we are doing and how we are feeling. We forget that the professional role we inhabit daily is just one of the many roles we bring to the world, that there are other parts of us that require our attention and nourishment.

Ironically, the quality of the relationship we have with ourselves is what we also bring to every other relationship we have in our lives, both current and new. Losing connection with our needs can hinder the quality of our connections with others, be they clients, friendships, parents, children or strangers. We can be left with a sense of separation, unclear as to where we begin and where we end.

So how can we learn to support ourselves to live and work in a more self equipped way, live more mindfully?

Coaching support is one such way.

Coaching works from the empowering premise that we already have the resources within us to fuel ourselves when needed. Resources which help us overcome challenges in our lives. We just sometimes need some outside assistance to help us access them. An experienced coach with an intuitive ability to really tune in with the person can facilitate this process most effectively.

Coaching is now-centred. Through conscious listening, questioning and appropriate challenging, the person takes visits where necessary to the past but is primarily focused on moving forward from the here and now to the future. 

The coaching process’ core intention is to help the person become more self- aware. This then enables the person connect with choices and possibilities that had not been obvious before now.

The coaching relationship is an invaluable way for anyone to deepen and strengthen a sense of self and self-support in both work and personal living. By giving ourselves the deliberate attention we sometimes need, we are then better equipped and better prepared to support our relationships to the best of our capacity.

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This entry was posted in Healing Relationships, personal development and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to As we support others, how can we support ourselves?

  1. Anne Tannam says:

    HI Linda Am really enjoying your latest post but for some reason, when I click into read more the post disappears. A

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